25 things about me

I was asked to write this list for a class I’m taking today, or a class I would be taking today but will now be watching a recording of on Sunday as I got a late invite to a(n outdoor, distanced, masked) wedding.

  1. When I was eight months old, our family dog attacked me. Had the bite been a millimeter higher, I would have lost my left eye. Until a couple of years ago, the only evidence of the attack was a tiny bubble in the crease below my eye, which has since disappeared. (I had a very good plastic surgeon.)
  2. When I was in high school, my friend told me a guy liked me, so I sent her one of those email questionnaires with info about me so she could feed him some pointers. When he picked me up for our coffee date playing the Beastie Boys, I nearly guffawed. Seems pretty obvious I’d grow up to become a too-stalkable person who’d leave breadcrumbs all over the internet.
  3. I’ve never seen the movie Footloose all the way through, because my college roommate and I used to fast-forward to all the dance scenes and dance along with them.
  4. In high school, my friend Natalie and I would go to her house at lunch, bake Pillsbury sugar cookies, and watch the dating show scene from Mallrats, then bring the warm cookies back to school with us.
  5. I have been trying to locate my favorite childhood nanny, Kristina Kern, for the better part of the past decade. I can’t even imagine who I’d be without her influence.
  6. I spent my entire life terrified of the movie Jaws until I finally made myself watch it this summer, at age 38. It wasn’t actually scary.
  7. Depending on how many beers my father has had, I may or may not have been named after Kathleen Turner.
  8. I wrote my undergrad thesis on Riot Grrrl, or, more accurately, the role of music in feminist movements from the First through Third Waves.
  9. I always say my favorite books are A Confederacy of Dunces and The Elegance of the Hedgehog, but I haven’t read either in a decade and I’m not sure it’s still true.
  10. I have gone outside during the day without sunglasses on fewer than five times since 2003.
  11. I was once ghosted in a two-year relationship. As a result, I really, really hate people who ghost.
  12. Stored around my Brooklyn apartment are boxes of the Collector’s Edition Barbie dolls my grandmother bought me.
  13. When I was 33, I was watching a band play at a bar in the Hudson Valley with my then-boyfriend when one of the band members pulled out a saxophone and I suddenly remembered that I had played sax in jazz band in high school. I had completely forgotten I could play the sax. For 15 years.
  14. I can generally name a song in one note/chord. This is great during the Name That Tune round at pub trivia.
  15. I run over every starting line to “Good Vibrations” by Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch. I’m so sorry.
  16. I once walked into a coffee shop and was suddenly aware that I was looking around for my Twitter crush, a person I didn’t know IRL, instead of the friend I was there to meet. Once my friend arrived, we headed into another room and at the next table over was my crush.
  17. I have an alter ego named Élodie Clyde . Sometimes I intentionally shapeshift into her; sometimes it happens by accident.
  18. Twice in my life, in the U.S., European men have stopped me on the street to ask if I’m also European. I’m pretty clearly a standard gauche American so I don’t know why.
  19. The first two words I ever read were “Pet Sematary.”
  20. The first band I saw in concert was the Rolling Stones. The last concert I saw before COVID was my friend Tim’s band.
  21. I’ve lived in the same apartment for eight years, which seems ludicrous.
  22. I live across the street from my best friend, meaning I’ve achieved the life goal I set for myself at age six.
  23. Said best friend and I co-host a Hallmark Christmas movie podcast.
  24. I’ve been obsessed with Hello Kitty for my entire life. As a toddler, this meant wearing Hello Kitty overalls in my nursery school photo. As an adult, it means having a Hello Kitty guitar (OK and a Hello Kitty Balenciaga bag, but know I did not pay full price for it).
  25. In preparation for writing this list I dug up my old blog from 2006 where I discovered that I had written a list of 100(!) things about me. I’m not sure I even know 100 things about myself at this point.

One thought on “25 things about me

  1. Confederacy of Dunces is one of those books that – if it comes around at the right time in your life – becomes a favorite for a while. I don’t’ think I’ve aged well along with it.


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