Start here

Here are a few of my favorite older posts that should give you a sense of whether you’re going to hate-read or love-read this blog. You can also read 25 things about me.

5 ways to fake a vacation (when you can’t take one)

“Sometimes, as Rose tells Sue Ellen in Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead, ‘I really need to get away.’ Unfortunately, that need doesn’t always coincide with periods of my life in which I can actually skip town — or the country.”

I literally did not even know from whence I spoke. This oddly COVID-appropriate piece from four years ago has some ideas for ways to get that “away” feeling from your couch (or beddesk).

Finding a backup purpose for someone

“In other words, just because I get the idea in my head that some guy or some job is perfect for me doesn’t mean it’s true, and holding onto that idea serves no purpose other than to hurt me. When we argue with reality, we lose.”

Creating internal drama when I don’t get my way? Could absolutely be me! But do as I say in this post, not as I do. Truly WHO was this bastion of centeredness and which pile of clothing on my bedroom floor is she hiding under?

Operationalizing creativity

“Shifting my focus toward creative ops has not only helped me create more art; it’s also helped me create better art, because systematizing creativity has cleared up space in my head to produce new ideas.”

A piece where I break down the unsexy side of my creative process. Here’s how I get things done.

On not settling

“My backup plan is that I will spend my life with ME, and I will only let in a person who can compete with that scenario. I won’t settle for someone who doesn’t make me feel ferociously alive just because he checks all the boxes. I will not force things with someone I’m lukewarm about and risk not being available to meet the guy I’d commit arson for.”

This is some of the most me shit I’ve ever written.

4 shallow, self-serving ways I’m coping with the impending apocalypse

“My near-term approach for dealing with this brave new world that not only has such people in it but also elects such people to the highest office in the land is to do as much as possible to make *myself* feel better.”

LOL at what I thought the apocalypse was! But anyway, these are probably also useful as COVID coping mechanisms.

My only constant is perpetual growth

“I have this theory that in every functional relationship there needs to be a Mick Jagger and a Keith Richards. Mick is the showman, the magnetic one who gets the attention, but Keith is the one who keeps things running. Mick is a fresh coat of paint; Keith is the engine. When you have two Micks, there’s an issue of oneupmanship. When you have two Keiths, well, I have no idea, because the point I’m obviously getting to is that I am a Mick.”

The title of this one is misleading; it’s essentially about romantic relationships and the kind I think works best for me.

How to get out of your own way and do the work

“I wrote a novel last year. It’s bad! But you know what that process taught me how to do? Write a novel. I started another novel on January 1, and I’m already better at it. Being bad at things is the path to being great at things.”

For when your brain is making a lot of noise, here’s a short list of ways to limit its influence.

How to create space for art in your busy life

“There’s always a reason why you should go into work on time, stay at the office late, or take on an additional project or five instead of taking an impromptu day trip upstate, attending Creative Mornings, taking a painting class, etc. Saying yes to things will add variety to your life, resulting in more energy.”

This one offers tiny ways to add more art and creativity to a very busy life. I feel busier now than I did pre-COVID, but I still feel like at least some of these should be possible for everyone.

Live more creatively: How to be a life artist

“I’ve noticed that thinking of myself as a life artist has been a self-fulfilling prophecy in certain ways: I live my life with more intention, I focus more on my creative work, I think more about where my time is going.”

On how a random compliment from my friend Devin led to a meaningful identity shift.